Get Paid For Your Sex Or Don’t Give It!
Get Paid For Your Sex Or Don’t Give It!
My dad, who has mentored me to be the woman I am, fell very sick. He had always been diabetic, but was now diagnosed with cancer. I badly wanted him to be cured and I believed it was possible. I wanted him to be comfortable. But with the ordinary job I have it was impossible. So I thought long and hard to find something I could do with what I already have, without the need for capital, without asking anyone for anything…
My mind took me right back to the classrooms I’ve sat in. I thought to myself…I can write! If from grade 3 up until I completed college, my average for essay writing was 70%, then I am a writer! If a teacher who is marking your essay to tell you where you went wrong gives you an 80% surely it should be easier for an ordinary reader to give you 100%…With those thoughts in mind, I bought a counter book and found a pen. As soon as I put my bags down after work on the 13 September 2014, with tears rolling down my cheeks, I started writing.
The reasons I was so emotional when I started writing are: – firstly I was touched so much by my dad’s illness and helplessness knowing how powerful and strong he had always been. Secondly, I was going to write and share my very own true life experiences with the hope of changing someone else’s life. My book, Get Paid For Your Sex Or Don’t Give It! is a dissection of womanhood. I tried to be as candid as possible to identify ‘Woman’.
In the book I take a man on a rare trip through a woman’s mind…any woman! By the same token I urge the woman to accept her intended design and acknowledge who she truly is, to enable her to then communicate to the opposite sex what a woman is, what a woman expects, her true fears, wants and needs. I wrote this book to better relationships between men and women, and just relationships in general. I believe that relationships work better when the two parties involved are completely honest about what they truly expect, and what they are truly able to bring into the relationship. The results of such communication among others are: – less men or women get into relationships with high hopes, only to be disappointed by reality and the reduction of divorce rates, casual relationships and heart ache.
Besides being packed with information that your ordinary woman in their ‘right mind’ wouldn’t dare reveal, and have their name attached to it, the book is really funny. My kids would come up stairs to ask what I was laughing at, and I would tell them, “What I am about to write!” My dad, lived to see the soft copy of the book that I sent my sister via email, he couldn’t read anymore. He left a book about the importance of family, and a message with my sister for me to have it published. But my mum read my book and her comment was, “You are on point. Every young person should read it.”
Because I believe in the concept I communicate in the book so much, I am developing a game to illustrate it. I would like youngsters who haven’t been in relationships yet to get a glimpse of what certain decisions or non-decisions could lead to, to better equip them for mating decisions. Or people who are already in relationships to realize where they may have gone wrong or missed the point. I will need to consult a professional game designer to have it professionally done.
My challenge was that I wanted my book out as soon as possible. I
couldn’t take it to your traditional publishers, where it would take some two
years or so before it was out. So I opted for self publishing. I just paid for
services that I could afford. I could not afford editing services, printing,
marketing and distribution. So as a result, my gem is still waiting to be sold.
I believe the subject I discuss in the book is relevant to every human being
and therefore it’s just a matter of a proper marketing strategy and the funds
to do it, and the book sells and change people’s lives.
So who is Blessing Chitari?
So you will see on the cover of the book, it says Dakota Hathaway. That’s me. That is my pen name. I just thought it sounded more author-like and catchy. Well, I am Zimbabwean, born in Harare and did all my education in Zimbabwe. I moved to South Africa in 2007 because of economic hardships. I studied literature all my high school years and was almost always top of the class in the subject. I was appointed editor of the first school magazine and I didn’t think it was a big deal, but thinking about it now…it kinda was! What qualifies me to write about this topic? Well I have been a woman for as long as I can remember, heading for forty, and still am.
As a person I love music, art and people. I love well put together music, I love taking in nice visual art and just having a great conversation especially with someone who doesn’t know me and I don’t know them, because that way there are no expectations and we tend to be carefree…I just love waking up and seeing and hearing people…my ideal home would have to be in the ghetto. That’s why I write; to communicate my thoughts and feelings with fellow human beings…I think that is beautiful.
More about the project
I see my book as only the beginning of a brand, or even a movement. I have a million ideas for other projects that will come out of the book project. But what I would like to do now is:
- Have the book edited
- Have the book printed in South Africa (The book is currently being printed in the UK which is very expensive. The contract I have with my current self-publishing company allows me to change the cover design and have the book printed anywhere I choose.) So this will include re-setting the book for printing and re-designing the cover.
- Bulk printing copies for selling
- Getting professional marketing services like printing of banners, t-shirts as well as search engine optimization
- Holding events like a book launch or signing event
- Have the game professionally designed
- Transportation of books to events and book stores.
- Printing Banners and T-shirts to market the book
I realize that although I opted for the cheaper and faster option to publish my book, if I want good results, the project has to be funded adequately and the R100 000 should just about do it.
I will be looking forward to your assistance. Thank you so much!!!
I am the team. From the ideas, the script, the typing, the research, the editing, cover design…it’s all been me so far.