I’ve had a turbulent past and music has helped shine light to guide me out. My path has not been a straight one, but I continually am trying to find my truth in a world that seems to idolize the opposite.
“The Lotus comes from the murkiest water but grows into the purest thing” – Nita Ambani
My fundraiser is dedicated to so many different people, those past, present, those complete strangers kindred in spirit. I dedicate this to the voices of hushed children everywhere that have been abused mentally, physically, and/or sexually. I dedicate this to the survivors of the Élan School in Poland, Maine and to Michael Skakel to whom I celebrate his art that remained sequestered with him for 11 years behind bars. This campaign is for those who may be afraid to reach out and speak up. It is for every artist everywhere who’s art has been overlooked or never heard. The Wanderlust VW Bus Recording Studio gives myself and artists whom I believe in, the chance to record their own music in a professional studio with a truly organic vibe and gives them perhaps one of the greatest gifts of all: fulfillment by sharing their own unique story.
THE WHY
I was a troubled teen that was bounced around in the system; from juvenile detention centers, shelters, hospitals, I was always on the run from something (see book title). I was sent away to a very controversial therapeutic boarding called the Élan School in Poland, Maine until I turned 18. It has since been shut down in recent years for allegations of torture and abuse. It was here in the walls of the school that I found my voice, but it was here too that my voice was first silenced.
In helping to fund my book entitled HerStory-Girl On The Run, and my album, you are not only helping to close this chapter of my life, but also helping to close this chapter for some of my closest friends and classmates that still have painful memories about what they experienced. I will be visiting them on the Wanderlust Bus and getting their stories too. Some do not wish to comment and I respect their wishes, but some would like their voices heard. You can be apart of exposing what some documentaries have called “Kids for Cash” and what books like “Duck in a Raincoat” are about.
In addition, the Wanderlust Bus Studio will be traveling across the nation stopping to record with several artists that I have wanted to work with for years! Also, we will record musicians who may not have been given a chance due to whatever reason, but are completely deserving. If time permits, no one with a musically pure heart will be turned away.
WHY NOW
Music has always been apart of me. Yes, I was a silenced young adult who vowed to make a difference through my craft, but the music industry chewed me up and spit me out. The first band I ever joined was called Kidney Thieves and I was hired to replace the original lead singer. They had been on national tours with KMFDM and Chevelle had even been their opening act. They had records on two major motion picture soundtracks and a video on MTV. Upon joining the band, I on the other hand, had never even been to a single concert. While kids my age were begging their parents to go see The Offspring, Sublime, Bush, Smashmouth, and Sneaker Pimps, I was still institutionalized. Later down the line while I was apart of KT, I was told that I needed to lose weight no matter what the cost. I refused to put my health at risk so I quit to pursue better horizons.That’s the biz right? I say neigh.
Then came the record deal! Oh boy, a contract! A big producer wants to put me on the radio… every artist’s dream, right?!? But it came with a price! The Deal: sell your soul, any sort of identity and human rights you have to these producers…and by the way… this is binding, exclusive to the universe.I thought the term exclusive to the universe in a recording contract was funny at first, like I was a Jedi or something. I was thinking to myself , “Oh yeah, right. I’ll be booking a show on Pluto late August and then jet to Saturn in September. Then we’ll throw a battle of the bands Star Wars style.” But…they were serious, and sadly, it meant they owned me. The producers I signed to released a single that I’d been required to perform; however, I was strong-armed into singing about masturbation and wearing next to nothing.Their reasoning was, “The Divinyls did it, why can’t you?” They believed shock value was the name of the game. The title of the record they released with my vocals was called “Playin’ With Myself” and it was on radio countdowns in small markets with the likes of Lady Gaga, Rihanna, Mariah Carey, Justin Bieber, and Miley Cyrus. That part felt pretty great. But what I couldn’t handle was that the song appealed to a market of 10 year-old-little girls! I refused to continue to do interviews, make press statements, or make any more appearances. So, I got shelved. I was still under contract so no one else could work with me, but they had no intention of working with me either.
Where is she now, you ask?
Well, I’m in a watered down Las Vegas scene of DJs where you press a button and the crowd goes nuts.I refuse to play DJ Barbie. That’s where I put my foot down. I really need your help here peeps.
All I want is to give back, to be heard by someone, anyone and to make a difference. My goal hasn’t changed but the issues have from years ago. The world I knew when I was a teenager has changed. That world doesn’t exist anymore. It seems everyone is hiding behind their computer screen now. Kids appear to be more affluent at expressing themselves emotionally and making themselves vulnerable because of the screen to hide behind, but humanity and art are dying. Vulnerability and true emotion are dying. The word love is thrown around like used paper towels, crumbled up and not even recycled. More like french fries, yeah I love french fries, but I don’t LOVE french fries. I’ll take an emoticon with my love for french fries, hashtag #stopit!
Downloading music for free is encouraged.True art is becoming watered down further and further until all we’re left with is water….and we are in a drought! NOTE: I will not use any internet for marketing after completion of campaign. I’m fighting fire with fire here and using “the enemy” tactfully for now, hoping to get your attention. YouTube and iTunes NO MORE! I will not support the machine. I may be standing alone in the end, but I hope to be in wanderlust surrounded by wonderful people, phenomenal art, and real music. I hope I won’t be standing alone. Please join the cause!
WHEN
As soon as our goal of $40,000 has been reached and the bus/studio/DJ booth is built, it’s GO TIME!!!! The mobile DJ booth will function as my work space so that I may gig for gas! Don’t worry, I got gas covered!
WHERE
If you donate or have donated, you’ll be able to catch the bus via postcard with details about its next stop. The album is scheduled to be released at Burning Man. Hope to see you all there!
HOW
Every donation helps get me one step closer to achieving my dream and regaining bits of my soul that the music industry took away from me. The result: Soulful music YOU helped create and for that I am beyond words grateful!!!